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Wednesday, May 1, 2013

How to GET OVER YOURSELF in 5 Easy Steps

*Note, this post may have a sort of tough love vibe, so try not to be too offended by the negative nature. It is a rant of sorts that I've been holding in, but I will try to make it like a tutorial of sorts to keep it fun to read.

I have recently made the discovery (thanks, Tumblr) that there are a lot of people who need help getting over themselves. What does that mean exactly? Well, someone who needs to get over his or herself can be taken in many ways. For example, it could mean someone who is so obsessed with themselves or think they are just the greatest thing since sliced bread. In this instance, we are talking about those people who feel the need to control other people's lives as if their opinion of the person actually matters and they are doing some sort of service to society by making that opinion known. Well, I've got news for those people--NO ONE CARES and you need to get over yourself.

Don't get me wrong--I am all for loving oneself and thinking you're awesome and beautiful, but when it involves intruding other people's lives as if it affects your own and trying to tell someone they are wrong for thinking a way that is not ideally your view, this is when you need to stop and get over yourself.

Now you may be saying, "Oh gosh, I am just like how you described! Sarah, whatever am I to do?" Well, luckily for you, I've prepared instructions on how to get over yourself in five easy steps. Are you ready? Let's begin!

1. Stop taking everything so personally. I have some sad news to break--and try your best not to be too hurt but--people are probably not out to get you. Most of what they say probably has little or nothing to do with you. And even if it does--you are the one who chooses to be offended by it or take it personally. Just take a breath and be reminded that the world doesn't revolve around you. People have their own experiences, troubles, and obstacles to go through. The odds that someone is putting a lot of their time into bothering you are incredibly slim, mostly because (and don't get too butt-hurt over this) they could care less about your feelings. Humans by nature are selfish creatures. They aren't going around thinking about the way others feel 50% of the time--so they, most likely, don't care enough to actually make such a valiant effort in offending you. Seriously.

2. Realise that it's okay to be jealous. Most of the time, you feel the need to act this way because you are jealous of someone and want some sort of control or satisfaction of being better than them in a way, so you make that reason up. Thus leading you to need to get over yourself. A lot of people have problems accepting that they envy others and instead make up reasons to hate that person they resent. It doesn't make you a bad person, everyone does it, but think about it--you need to get over yourself. There will always be someone who is better at something than you are, more successful than you are, and more happy than you are--but who cares? That's their life to live, and you've got yours. Stop taking out your jealousy on them and try to live your own life to the fullest! It's not their fault they are happy!

Once you realise that being jealous is okay and a natural part of human life, what do you do? You're probably thinking, "I can't admit that to him/her!" Well, luckily, you don't have to. The best way to handle jealousy is not by saying "Oh my gosh, I'm so jealous of you," but rather being as supportive as you can for that person and be proud of their accomplishments! Maybe through support you'll learn a thing or two and reach that level that you are oh so envious of in the first place.

To sum it up, if you're the type of person that thinks you're perfect--you're not. And if you're the type of person that thinks you're just a mess with nothing going for you--you're not. An important piece in the puzzle of getting over yourself is realising the fact that you are human.

3. Stop putting so much effort into hating. This one is for all of you self-sufficient anonymous Tumblr ankle biters out there who think that they are doing the world a huge favour by stepping in and passive aggressively telling them what's wrong and what's right. Newsflash--no one cares. The amount of effort you put into griping on someone can exceed pathetic levels. If you'd focus more time on yourself and not on what other people choose to do with their life, maybe you wouldn't actually have all that hatred.

Sometimes people do this for fun. That's really sad. Think about that for a second. You're bored so you are going to harass someone for some reason you concocted in your mind. Pathetic. Get over yourself.

4. Think about what you're doing before you act.  All right, this one is kind of cliché, but honestly, did you really think through what you're saying properly, or are you just on your high horse and need to get over yourself? Stop and think--wait, maybe what I'm doing could be thought through more thoroughly. There will always be pros and cons to any given situation, so think them through--maybe even write them down on a list (like below)! If you're just hurting someone to hurt them, you've got some serious getting over yourself to do.


5. Put yourself in the other person's shoes. (or in my case, specifically, the other person's velvet mary-janes or cheetah print loafers or patent t-bar flats!) Yet another cliché, but think about this one. You are probably rolling your eyes, but sometimes this is what being an adult is all about (or someone who is capable of being over themselves). If they said something that got you all riled up, just stop, take a breath, and reflect on where they are coming from. This takes us back to Step 1, where you were reminded that not everything is always about you. So this time, think about what the person might actually be talking about. Get out of your own head for just a moment and think. If you're given some perspective from another point of view, you might be able to realise "Huh... maybe people actually have other things going on that aren't me!" Crazy stuff.


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Now that you've read this little tutorial, hopefully you've understood how to behave in society as someone who is over themselves. And if not, hopefully it at least gave you a little lift.

♥ Sarah


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